Monday, August 20, 2012

Ventsday

Now Ventsday is supposed to be on a Wednesday...but hell it's Monday. Mondays are no fun. I'm working 14 hours today on roughly 4 hours of sleep so fuck it. I'm venting today!

  1. I'm tired. I don't know what was wrong with me last night but I was up tossing and turning and could not get comfortable and could not clear my head. Too much to think about and contimplate and wish for I guess!
  2. I hate being broke. I've always been good with handling money and saving and being responsible but working 30 miles away from home is really stupid when you are a college student driving an SUV. Every trip there and home is 1/4 a tank of gas. Which is roughly $30. and I get paid $9-$9.50 (depending on weekday or weekend) so I work two hours besically for the price of gas and when you only work 4 hour days it's pointless. I seriously should have kept my job back in Annandale it would have saved me so much time and money. The saddest part is that I spend more money on gas a month than I do on my actual car payment every month. Not to mention my truck needs new tires=$600, I need a parking pass for school=$200, and textbooks have yet to be purchased...roughly=$300-$500. Some days I seriously contimplate just leaving school. I personally believe that a degree under your belt should not be needed for certain jobs. If I could land a high paying job right now and just learn via observation and training (which is all I need. I don't need to read a stupid ass textbook) I would quit school right now and take that job. I'm on my last year of college and I don't feel any more prepared for a career in psychology then I did back in high school. This country frustrates me, the economy frusrates me, and I just want to be done with school and start a full time job so I can pay my damn bills.
  3. Time changes suck.  It's poopy having a Fiance' who goes to bed just as you are waking up/getting off of work and wakes up just as you are going to bed. Maybe it wouldn't be as bad if my stupid cellphone could get service at work so I would have a little more time to Facebook chat him...but nope. T-mobile is a joke...but the only damn service broke college kids can afford.
  4. I've lost all motivation to run. A couple months ago running was amazingly awesome and I did it every single day. Now all I want to do is sit on the couch and eat. I feel so worthless and so lazy and I don't know why. Maybe it's the fact that I am working doubles at work every single week, maybe I just don't give a shit about the way I look anymore...maybe all this stress of having a loved one overseas and no money in the bank is the cause. I just don't know but something has to change or I'm going to go crazy.
  5. I wish my friends would make a trip to my town when they want to hang out. Why do I always have to drive to them? Ticks me off sometimes.
  6. I'm getting sick of always having to sacrifice everything for other people. At work: I cover shifts for people all the time. Do you think they could cover any for me like when I have a huge concert I paid good money to go see? Hell no. When my brother needs a car to go to work or go hang out with friends who has to sacrifice going somewhere so he can use their car? Me. Who has to pick up their life and leave everyone behind and move? Me. Ok I'm not really going to complain about that one cause I'm excited for it...lol. I just hope it doesn't backfire and blow up in my face.
That's all I can think of right now. But I'm sure more will come up. I'm just in a very bad mood today...I just want it to be over.

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